Navy Wife in Jakarta

Wife Beating

July 11, 2006

I spent Tuesday morning in the smoky halls of the South Jakarta Police Headquarters. I bet not many expats can boast that! But I was there because exactly one week ago, my maid’s husband, Pak Ari, decided to beat his wife in public.

Jon and I arrived home from the US Embassy’s Fourth of July celebration to find my maid, Niah, and her younger sister in a state of shock. They were resting on the couch, but were clearly rattled by something, and it was clear that Niah had been crying. I first assumed that her husband must have come by causing trouble again – yelling and threatening her – as he has done in the past.

Niah and Ari agreed to a divorce this past January. Things had not been good for most of their young marriage. Niah soon realized that her husband was a layabout and a jerk. After only one year of marriage things had turned very bad. He would take her salary and he used it to entertain mistresses and to drink. He subsequently lost his job (from the drinking, Niah has told me), and became abusive – verbally and physically. But he never beat her enough to put her in the hospital, nor did she ever come in with black eyes, but he knocked her around a bit. Certainly enough to make Niah want out of the marriage.

The worst news for Niah came when the landlord showed up and demanded three months of rent from Niah, but Niah had given her husband her salary and he was supposed to have paid the rent. She asked me for a loan to pay the landlord, and I refused. Jon and I told her to stand up to the landlord and to simply say that he had to get the money from her husband, since she had already given Ari the money to cover the rent. I essentially told her to play the gender card, and it did work. She also removed all of her belongings from the small apartment and moved in with us, basically leaving her husband to deal with the landlord. Do you know what her husband said he did with the money. He spent it on drink because “(Niah) makes him so crazy”. So he viewed it as Niah’s problem.

It has been explained to me that in Indonesia, if the man wants out of the marriage, the community will support him and the family of the woman will usually encourage her to sign the divorce papers and couples really do try to leave on amicable terms. I am sure it is related to saving face, but it may be more of a community concern too. However, women who want out of a marriage can only get out if their husband is willing to grant a divorce, and the community will not support her if her husband doesn’t want out of the marriage. She is encouraged to be a good (or better) wife to him, and to stick it out and try to make it work. Niah’s family and Ari’s family convened a family council to encourage Ari to let Niah go, because she was so unhappy and because of the problems that he had. Ari’s parents were mainly responsible for getting him to agree to the divorce.

Now, it seems that Ari has changed his mind, although he has signed all the papers, and there is no going back at this point. They received a religious divorce first, and then filed the necessary papers with the state. They have surrendered their marriage license, and now the only thing that they don’t have is the official document from the government certifying that they are divorced, but this is just a matter of time, for Niah expects to have it by the end of the month. But they are divorced, and he has legal claim on her any longer.

On the night of July 4th, he was waiting for Niah to return to our compound, and when she approached the gates on the back of an ojek (that's a taxi motorcycle) he grabbed her and pulled her to the ground. He then began to kick her head and upper body. He screamed as he did, "This is my wife! If I want to kill her, I can!"

Fortunately, the HERO grocery store security guy noticed started yelling for him to go away, and that attracted the attention of our own Kemang Club Villa security, and they joined in and essentially yelled at him until he stopped. Niah's younger sister was with her on the ojek, and I think was just so shocked and surprised by his violent behavior that she just withdrew into herself. I am glad that she was not hurt.

Niah didn’t think she was hurt enough to go the doctor. She said she just wanted to rest, so I provided her with ibuprofen for the pain. She rested all the next day, at my insistence, for she kept trying to clean and I had to keep stopping her. She showed no bruising the next day, although we did notice some swelling in her arm and neck, but this disappeared by the end of the day. Niah thought that maybe Ari had been drinking again, but she did say this was the worst she had ever seen him. I ordered her to stay inside our compound until we could figure out what the best thing to do would be. One thought was to send her home to her kampung for a while, in the hopes that he would cool down.

I did call our embassy to get some help -- what should I do, what should I not do. What I learned was that this is actually pretty common here. Husbands hitting wives or fathers hitting daughters. There definitely still is a culture of "owning" women here, so if a woman does anything out of line, hitting them is acceptable.

The embassy strongly recommended making a police report (which is very daunting in this male-oriented culture, and certainly the male dominated police force). The embassy has employees that help with this, though, so Niah would not have to do this alone. Once Ari knows that we’ve filed the police report, our RSO (regional security officer) warned me that this would either (1) escalate the violence, or (2) end the violence. So, my plan became to encourage Niah to make the report, and then return to her family in the kampung.

In the meantime, Ari kept calling our number trying to get Niah on the phone. He even got women to call for him, and they always claim to be a friend of Niah's, so now I just tell all of Niah's "friends" in my simplistic bahasa Indonesian "I am the boss here, and Niah isn't talking to anyone! Stop calling!"

The night before we were to go in to the police to make the report, Niah told me that she wanted to not do it. She was very scared for herself and her family. Ari was now threatening her uncle. Niah hadn’t left our compound since the beating, and her family had been checking on her regularly at my house. Her family was helping to shield her from Ari and this was making him mad. I did convince her to at least meet with the embassy employee outside the police station as planned and to tell him about the new threats before deciding whether to go through with the report or not. Of course, his recommendation was to proceed because with the police report, for without it the police cannot arrest Ari for hurting or harassing her family. So he helped her understand that the police report could protect her family and that Ari didn’t even need to know that report had been made.

While Niah made her report, I was seated with the a captain of that section of the police, even though I didn’t want to be there. I was waiting in the car until the embassy employee who was helping asked me to come inside. I made small talk with the captain, and I kept saying that I didn’t want to take up his time, and that I was happy to wait in the hall. But he said things were not busy and so we chatted. He did ask me about Niah and her work ethic, and I spoke very well of her. I did tell him that Ari had been calling the house frequently and that I had told him to stop. The captain told me that I could make a separate police report about this type of harassment. I told the embassy employee that I did not want to bother the police with this kind of report, because it will most likely stop very soon when all this is resolved, and anyway, the police of Indonesia have a lot more important things to deal with then some stupid ex-husband making phone calls.

The reporting of Ari’s abuse took all morning. I was surprised by how condescending the police were to Niah, and I have to say how proud I am of her for sticking up for herself. They were making excuses for her ex-husband’s behavior, which sickened me, and so when Niah kept insisting that hitting her wasn’t a way for him to show her that he wanted her back, I was cheering inside. Niah did make the decision with the police to not have Ari confronted yet by a police officer. Rather, she decided to inform her family that if Ari tries to hurt any of them or is threatening them, they are to call the police. Then and only then, will the police step in.

I know that Niah was relieved after the report was made. I know how hard this was for her and I know how it much it drained emotionally. I can only hope that her husband will calm down and let her go.

Passport Problems

July 6, 2006

Well, it’s been over a month, and I still don’t have a passport for either Niah or Umi. Jon and I decided to proceed with getting passports for both of them, since we’d like to take Niah to Singapore (for helping out when I go to give birth to our second child) and then take Umi back to the U.S. for the visit at Christmas.

I am very disappointed in the person that our travel agent uses to help get passports. Pak Dedi has not been entirely clear with me or my staff, nor does he even attempt to be civil now. Through a misunderstanding with my staff (who talked to him directly) we may now never be able to get Umi a passport. I hold him entirely accountable for the error, and am quite upset that he is not even attempting to remedy the situation.

The error was this: Umi told him that she did not have an original school certificate or birth certificate (one of these documents is one of the required documents needed). He asked if she could get a copy of one of them. She thought that this meant it would be okay to supply a doctored Xerox copy, so she copied her cousin’s school certificate (who is only one year older than her, went to the same school, and whose name is only one letter off from hers – Sumi vs. Umi). The agent accepted the Xerox and then was surprised when Umi couldn’t produce the original. He never told Umi that she’d have to produce the original. So although I do see Umi’s action as forgery and she should have been absolutely clear with him about what she had done; he is still the one that proceeded with the application with a clearly doctored school certificate, so I don’t think he did his job. None of my staff have ever applied for a passport, and I certainly don’t know how it’s done in this country either. We relied on him to guide us through the process and he blew it.

Thirty years ago, parents didn’t realize how important a birth certificate would be for their children. Most parents never even applied for them, and Umi’s parents never got one for her. Umi can’t get an actual birth certificate now, but she can get an equivalent document (so we’ve now discovered by talking to another passport agent) but for her this is very difficult because her parents have since separated. Umi is still going to try to get this document, because she cannot ever get a replacement school certificate. Public schools don’t keep records of their students so if you lose your school certificate, that’s your problem.

Niah’s passport was supposed to finished yesterday (Niah is younger and with the passage 10 years, parents began to realize how important a birth certificate could be, so she had hers and her school certificate) but Pak Dedi has not called or delivered the passport to the house. I have called him and text-messaged him to no avail. I haven’t decided whether to blacken the name of the travel agent in the expat community or not yet, but his lack of professionalism certainly does make me want to punish him and my travel agent who would be wise to manage him better.

Jon wants to move on and forget about it all. Chalk it up to a big cultural and language misunderstanding and not even bother getting the money back.

Of course, Jon’s not the one who was yelled at in bahasa Indonesian by Pak Dedi and then scolded in English by our trusted travel agent.

Licking the Coffee Logo

May 29, 2006

Jon's been in Yogyakarta since yesterday, helping out the US embassy assessment team. Bit of mess in the area, Jon reports. Couldn't he "assess" that from here? Anyway, he's checked in with me throughout the day, mostly to see how Thomas is adjusting to pre-school!

I took Thomas out to the local coffee shop (Gloria Jean's, a chain I believe), and allowed him to eat all of the whipped cream off the top of my iced coffee (the staff there put extra on, precisely for this purpose). While waiting for the drink, Thomas decided to LICK the wooden cut-out of a large coffee cup that was affixed to the drink counter. Great!

Thomas was so exhausted from school today that he was falling asleep at the dinner table (this was around 5pm). He wouldn't eat anything so I just took him upstairs and laid him in bed. He was out almost immediately. He woke up at 6pm, screaming his head off from another bad dream (we went through this last Wednesday too), and I had to shake him awake. He kept screaming "I want mommy, mommy!" but I was right there holding him and telling him that I was here. He eventually "snapped" out of it, but man, this transition to school is tough!

It's funny, Jon and I thought that getting Thomas into the school routine would be good so that when the new baby does come along, he won't feel pushed away; rather, he'll be returning to something familiar. What I've realized (after observing him for 5 days in the classroom) is that school can actually teach him some useful skills -- mainly "I'm not the center of the universe", but also sharing. Both good things to have down before a sibling arrives on the scene. We are such rookie parents!

Don't know if school can teach Thomas not to lick random things, though.

Another Car Accident!

May 10, 2006

I think our car must have bad karma. It's been in it's third fender bender since we've moved here. Nothing big, just a scratched bumper, but we really put a big dent in the other car. Jeez!

So, we've got a new driver, and we've had him for almost three months, and I think things are going okay, but instead we get in an accident that I still don't see how could have happened. Well, wait, it's the kind of accident that I would have here (misjudging how much space I have on the left side of the car and trying to merge into traffic). But that's why I have a driver!

I've found out that there is a local Javanese car blessing ceremony (this is not Islamic, probably harkens from the animistic religion that existed way before buddhism or islam). When the car comes back from the shop, I am totally doing this with help from my neighbor's driver (who knows about the ceremony). I'll take pictures and post.

Volunteering at Johar Baru School

February 25, 2006

Today I volunteered to help fix up a local Indonesian public school -- Sekolah Johar Baru. Like many Indonesian public schools, the building is woefully run-down because there isn't enough money in the maintenance budget to actually maintain the school. Major work that needs to be done -- the list is endless! Today, NAMRU-2 staff (both Americans and FSNs) as well as some volunteers from the US Embassy came out to paint, clean and retile the school.

What needs to be done, though? Well, the beams holding up the roof of the school all show signs of termites and rot. The wiring in the classrooms for the lights is sub-standard and needs to be replaced. The counter where the kids get their snack in the morning is rotted and the area generally filthy. The roof over the counter where they get their snacks actually has visible holes in it (water must pour through when it rains, no wonder it's rotted!). The drainage ditches all around the school are not working properly. Half of them are filled with dirt and need to be dug-out. These are projects that will have to be tackled at a later date, when we have raised more money for the effort.

NAMRU-2 is hoping to give the school a small library of books written in Indonesian and English. To that end, cabinets with booksheves are being made to house the hoped for collection. A collection of books has been taken, although there's a long way to go on that! That too, luckily, is an ongoing project.

There are about 220 students in the school, grades 1-5. Some of them were there today to see what we were doing and when we could include them in the work, we did. We picked up garbage inside and outside of the school, and spoke a little English and some bahasa to them too. They were friendly and curious to see all these bule gila (crazy foreigners) getting dirty!

Small Car

November 21, 2005

After Gymboree class, Thomas and I stoped to look at the new Toyota cars on display in the atrium of the mall.

There were many mid-size/full-size cars, but there was one very small car. Two door, hatchback, and although you could put people in a rear seat, they'd have to be very small people. It was colored a harvest orange and had bright green and blue wavy lines painted down the sides.

Thomas reached up to open the door (because he could actually reach the handle quite easily) and declared that this car was "Thomas's car! Thomas's car!". Of course, this car is marked here because it's so small, but I thought it was funny how Thomas perceived the car as fitting him, a toddler. Perhaps there's a new market that Toyota should explore.

At times like these I wish I had my camera, but alas I didn't take it, because words don't capture the humor of this quite as much as a picture would.

Gurame Fish

November 2, 2005

I took Thomas with me to Ranch Market today to get just a few things before the Idul Fitri holiday was upon us. While at the fish counter, Thomas gleefully shouted, “fish, fish” and pointed to the large tanks with the big white fish swimming in them. I told him that they were Gurame fish. He looked at me, pointed at one fish and said “Grrr-mommy fish”, then pointed at another and said, “Grrr-daddy fish”, and lastly, “Grrr-baby fish!”

His first joke (or is it a pun?) -- regardless, I'm proud!

Sri Lanka!

August 10, 2005

Our two week break in Sri Lanka is quickly coming to a close. Jon’s outbreak training workshop has taken up most of his time, but it’s been a very nice holiday for Thomas and I. Although there is tons of cultural sites and other interesting things to do here, Thomas is pretty much interested in swimming, playing in the sand or throwing rocks, and chasing animals, of any sort. He joyfully tears after the crows that hover around the pool, screaming “animals, animals!” It’s quite funny, really.

Despite his lack of interest in other things, I have gotten out with him in tow to see the countryside (tea plantations, rice farms, small villages). I’m sure this wouldn’t be possible if he didn’t like to ride in a tuk-tuk (a small three-wheeled vehicle much like the Indonesian bajai). We were lucky enough to find a nice driver very early in our stay here. Nanda, the tuk-tuk driver, approached me on the beach and offered his services. This had happened to us already several times when we were on the beach, but I actually got a good feeling from him, so we’ve pretty much used him almost exclusively during our stay here. He’s taken me to the grocery, to sari stores, turtle hatcheries, and various gardens. He’s not pushy and has been very helpful. His English is excellent, and we’ve even spoken German together.

Thomas enjoyed visiting the turtle hatchery (we’ve actually been to 2 since we’ve been here). You can hold the baby turtles, if you like, and Thomas is fine with that until they start wriggling their flippers (which are quite strong!). He’s dropped several little guys, but they seemed to take it pretty well. At the first hatchery we visited, the place seemed a bit run-down and the fellow who was our guide (and owner) couldn’t seem to answer our question about why he was doing what he was doing. He led us through the tour and then brought us to the section where you could buy crappy souveniers to support the turtles. He got Thomas interested in a little shell turtle, so we caved and bought it for an incredibly high price (but again, “to support the turtles”). Gosh, I hope so, but have my doubts. A few days later we went to a second hatchery a few more kilometers down the road, and this one was better run. Both times we visited in the morning, so we didn’t get a chance to release the turtles on the beach (they send them back to the sea on Day 3 after hatching). The second hatchery did ask for donations rather than admission, and there was no schlock for sale.

After my friend Tracy arrived here with her husband, we went off to visit “The Brief” gardens (brief as in legal brief). Clever, considering the owner was a lawyer. He was also a rich Englishman who obviously fell in love with Sri Lanka and built a small villa and beautiful gardens overlooking his rubber plantation. I have now seen rubber trees. Had no idea that they looked more like birch trees than something tropical. I also got to see how they tap the trees for rubber. It’s a lot like the way they tap the Sugar Leaf Maples to get the sap to make syrup, except here they actually strip off the bark with a very small sharp knife in a pattern that encourages the gum to run into the little collection bowls (coconuts!).

I have seen tea growing, but didn’t visit a factory, so I’m not exactly sure how it gets from the beautiful green leaf to the crinkled black leaf that we strain water through. The plant is quite beautiful, very green, and when they pick the leaves, they only pick the top three leaves on the stem. The smallest newest leaf is Grade A quality tea, the medium size leaf if Grade B, and the bigger leaf is Grade C (except I don’t think they use that exact system, but it’s give you an idea of why certain teas might be more or less expensive the others. Tea in Sri Lanka is pretty darn cheap! You can buy a kilo for about 500 rupees (that’s about $5). I’ve bought some tea to give to my staff, but still have yet to buy for me. I’d better get to it!

I did, however, buy a sari. It’s dark blue and red with gold trim. It’s quite beautiful, although I don’t have the blouse and skirt that you were underneath it. I’m going to try to find them in Colombo before we leave on Sunday. I’ve promised Tracy that I’ll wear my sari to the Dining Out for NAMRU at the end on September. She acquired a sari here too, and we both thought it would be fun to wear it to this formal occasion. Now I’ll just have to acquire massive amounts of bangles for my arms!

Speaking of decorative jewelry, we also visited a moonstone mine. It was interesting to see this small scale mine where only three people worked the top of the shaft and three people worked down inside the shaft. They switch places every 30 minutes, and slowly haul up bucket after bucket of dirt. They chase seams of the moonstone in four different directions, and manage to find quite large chunks of it. In Sri Lanka there are two types of moonstone – white and blue – and it’s quite lovely. Tracy (who has lived in Peru) also tells me that there is blue and white moonstone there, although the Sri Lankan tour guide seem to make it out that only Sri Lanka had blue moonstone. Anyway, managed to pick up a small blue moonstone necklace made with silver, which was not too expensive (they kept showing me things that cost over $500, until I said – nope it’s got to be about $100.) They seemed unhappy that we would spend so little, but their attitude here is similar to that in Indonesia – because we are foreigners we are rich. And admittedly, we are rich in comparison, but that still doesn’t mean that I can just spend willy nilly on jewelry (even if I’d really like to be able to do that).

We did make it to Galle (that’s a big city in the south of the island). It’s got a huge Dutch built fort, and I’ve never seen a fort with the city inside it. Galle of course is now much bigger than the original settlement, but it was quite interesting to see the scale of the fort. Truly amazing. We didn’t really explore the city too much since it was Sunday and most things were closed. However, we were set upon by various vendors of Galle lace tablecloths and lacy items. The most interesting thing there, though, was the “crazy boys”. They are young Sri Lankan boys who will jump off on of the points of the fort into the water below (this is quite a considerable height to jump) for a mere 200 Rupees (that’s about $2). Not only do they jump off, but they do flips and somersaults as they dive. They also have added a twist – they challenge you to jump in too, and if you do it, they pay you 500 Rupees. They were quite spirited, and needless to say, I did not take them up on their dare. Forgot to mention that they actually have to scale the side of the fort’s walls in order to get back. There’s no ladder up!

Thomas has been fairly good natured during all these little jaunts, and he’s really getting to be quite a character. He loves animals in any form, and I think now assumes that on any given morning, we can get up and see animals. The other morning he woke up and told me, see elephants. We had seen an elephant on the beach the day before, and there elephants around and about as we’ve been going places, but I can’t just make an elephant appear, much to his disappointment. He settled for watching the mongooses gambling near the pool. His language development is coming along nicely. His comprehension is still much better than his output, but he’s actually making complete simple sentences already, like “Daddy go there,” or “Mommy swim far, “ or “Thomas eat green banana.” Which we tell him he doesn’t want to eat, because he likes the small yellow ones, so then he changes his tune and says, “Thomas eat small yellow ‘nana.”

The other day when he was in the pool and our friend Tracy was nearby wearing her newly acquired sari, I told Thomas to say “Mrs. Tracy pretty”, which he did do, dutifully, and then with absolutely no prompting from either Jon or myself, Thomas said “Mommy pretty”. That was so sweet. I wasn’t even wearing a sari! Just plain old mommy, however a quite tan mommy. Being in the sun everyday in this climate has produced quite a deep tan. I’ve been lathering up with SPF 50 every day before going out (Thomas too), but we are both getting quite dark!

Flipping Out at Home - Depression after Miscarriage

October 22, 2005

I realize that there’s a huge jump of time between me announcing that I was going home for a visit with family and then the Sri Lankan entry. Well, to sum up – went home and spent lots of time with family (immediate and extended), and just didn’t have the drive to do any log entries. Returned to Jakarta in mid-July, and then got caught up preparing for a trip to Sri Lanka with Jon (see Sri Lanka entry for fun vacation details). But going home was quite a serious endeavor – I was miserable and just had to go home – and now I’m ready to actually talk about what happened at home.

For some reason, I thought that going home would help ease my depression. For a good two weeks at the end of April, I didn’t want to eat or leave the house or really do anything. Eventually I did start doing things again, but it was hard to be out and about because it seemed every woman around me was pregnant. I remember a party at a friend’s house where Jon and I had debated about whether to go or not (were we too emotionally raw?) another friend announced her pregnancy, bringing to the total women in my acquaintance who were expecting to 5. Yikes!

Shortly after that we made the decision to send me home with Thomas for awhile. So, I arrive home exhausted but hopeful, and knowing that I should keep busy and active as a distraction. Mom and Dad had their picket fence scraped, sanded, wiped down with bleach and repainted while I stayed with them. Thomas helped with that (as much as he could), as well as helped with the extensive yard and garden work. But distraction worked for only so long, and I kept blowing up at everyone. Laura thought I should get help because I wasn’t acting normal, but it wasn’t until I felt so bad that I thought that if I were dead at least I wouldn’t feel crazy anymore – not exactly a suicide wish, but pretty close, and that really scared me. Luckily I was rational enough that I knew that this wasn’t normal, and that’s what made me make the call to the psych ward at the National Naval Medical Center.

It turns out that part of the depression did have a physical cause – after miscarriage it can still take 3 or 4 months for your hormones to equalize to pre-pregnancy levels, so I was experiencing similar problems that a women with post-partum depression would have. And the rest of the depression was just normal life-stress, and this past year has been pretty stressful. Let’s see – the move and life in Indonesia, a good friend committed suicide, had a miscarriage – three pretty stressful events. I remember saying to Jon before we left that I was ready for some “happy” and had enough of “sad”.

Dad was hoping that they would prescribe me a happy pill, but the psychiatrist I saw decided that I probably didn’t need anything. He actually pointed out that I was on a path to getting better, because at least I was functional and I was angry. And apparently angry is good, because it shows that you are fighting. So, I did a little talk therapy and at least when I was home I was losing my temper in a safe environment.

So, fast forward from crazy June and July to October, and emotionally, I’m on a much evener keel. So much so, I channeled all my energy into shopping and golf -- much to the detriment of our credit cards, but with great benefit to my golf game.

Returning Home

May 26, 2005

A few weeks about I declared to Jon that I had to return home for a visit.  This was not what we had planned (in fact, we had planned not to return to the states at all during our 2-year posting to Jakarta).  Luckily, I was able to find a great deal on a Korean Airlines flight that had only one stop-over and now Thomas and I are back in the DC area.

We arrived safely on Sunday around noon time here as planned.  The flight with Thomas was absolutely a nightmare. The flight attendants told me that Thomas was disturbing other passengers who were trying to sleep, and I pointed out that he was exhausted, as was I, and that we too would like to be asleep, and isn't nice that the other passengers can at least wear earplugs while I'm stuck with a fussy toddler. They left me alone for awhile after that.

Because neither of us really slept on the way over, we seem to have adjusted pretty well to the time change. Thomas is waking up sporadically in the night, but generally can be soothed back to sleep.  We rise at about 5:30 or 6 am now and are getting to sleep by about 7:30 or 8pm. He takes a pretty hefty nap in the afternoon right after lunch.

Right now I'm staying at my parents house in Annapolis.  The weather has been quite cool these past few days -- ranging from 60 to 70 degrees F.  Quite a change from Jakarta!  The air is clean and cool, and the sun sets later now so it's not even getting dark until 8pm. 

I took Thomas to see his Great Grandmother Talley yesterday at Manresa.  He was a little freaked out by her at first (probably the lack of teeth), but after a bit got more used to her.  Played with her stuffed animals and was able to point out family members in her pictures.   Because Manresa is located across the Severn River from the U.S. Naval Academy we were also able to watch the Blue Angels air show.  It was a somewhat shortened program this year because of the low-hanging clouds, but it was still neat to watch.  Thomas's emotions varied from pure joy and excitement to nervous and scared.  Admittedly, the sounds of the engines can be quite loud when the jets are moving away from you.

I heard on NPR yesterday that SBY is in Washington DC to meet with President Bush.  I wonder if this high-level visit had anything to do with the embassy closure in Jakarta.  Jon hasn't been able to tell me anything, since all he knows is that NAMRU and the American embassy are closed until further notice.  We might be headed toward an evacuation, but I don't even want to think about that right now! 

I seem to be fine adjusting to life as "American Mom" again. I don't need a nanny here at all, so I'm glad we didn't scramble to make that work (which we considered briefly). It's a bit more exhausting, since my Mom and Dad seem to be pretty clueless about being interactive grandparents.  Although Mom is getting better as she gets used to what life with a very active toddler is like.  I must remind myself that the last time they saw Thomas he couldn't even walk!

It's been strange these past few days in that everyone that I've been interacting with here has been so nice. At the Annapolis Mall I needed milk for Thomas and the coffee shop guy just gave it to me for free and wouldn't take any money. He also gave Thomas a cookie too! Similar thing happened at the Giant store this morning. I went out to buy cold medicine for Thomas (he picked up a cold on the plane, I'm sure), and the guy asked if I had my bonus card, and of course I don't have it, but he typed in his number, and I got an extra discount on my blueberries and cold medicine. So right now, America seems a pretty wonderful, friendly place.